So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
