your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize