New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
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