Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Randomize
