Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
