everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
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