you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize
