How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
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