Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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