quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
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