Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Randomize
