Why does Corona taste like a burp?
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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