I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
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