first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Then you guys just all showered together...?
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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