its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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