If that was your dad, he is hot
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
