What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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