is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
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