do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Randomize