i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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