How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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