I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity�
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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