did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Just pee around me
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Randomize
