brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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