I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
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