She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
he just fucked me for my cheese..
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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