I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Randomize
