First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
