Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Randomize
