im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
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