what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Randomize
