There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
