So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
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