I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
