I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Randomize
