and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
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