There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Randomize
