i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize