yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
