There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
Randomize
