wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Randomize
