I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
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