your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
My pussy is not your playground.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Randomize
