Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
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