Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Randomize
