I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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