Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
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