can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
