Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
He did a backflip because drugs
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
