So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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